As we head into another performance review season, I find myself both surprised and concerned by a trend I keep noticing: many corporations are still clinging to outdated, stress-inducing techniques to assess employee performance. These methods, often rooted in the belief that stress somehow drives productivity, are damaging to employees and limit their potential for real growth. It’s time to challenge this approach and introduce a healthier, more effective way of managing performance.
Stress is not a motivator
The idea that stress is a motivator is a persistent myth that needs to be debunked. It’s a misconception that stress will somehow push employees to achieve more, be more productive, and deliver better results. However, research has shown that chronic stress undermines performance, erodes mental health, and often leads to burnout.
And yet, as performance reviews roll around again this year, I keep hearing the same story from my clients. Many describe the dread and anxiety that creep in as review deadlines approach. Instead of focusing on doing their best work, they are consumed by self-doubt and fear. They spend countless hours preparing their reviews, only to need several days afterward to recover from the emotional toll. How can we expect employees to perform at their best when the very process intended to support their growth is causing so much harm?
Performance reviews trigger a fight-or-flight response
It’s important to understand what’s happening in the brain during performance reviews. When employees feel judged or pressured, it often triggers a fight-or-flight response—a survival mechanism that dates back to our earliest evolutionary stages. In this state, the brain perceives a threat, and the body jumps into survival mode.
Adrenaline and cortisol levels spike, preparing the body for immediate action. While this response is useful in life-or-death situations, it’s counterproductive in the workplace. Elevated cortisol—the stress hormone—floods the brain, and the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for critical thinking, decision-making, and problem-solving, becomes overwhelmed.
This cognitive flood diminishes the brain’s ability to function effectively, making it harder for employees to think clearly, process information, or make sound decisions. Instead of performing at their peak, they are simply trying to survive the review process. The very structure meant to evaluate and enhance performance instead leaves employees feeling rattled, disconnected, and unable to access their best thinking.
The Goldilocks Dilemma
To be clear, stress itself isn’t inherently bad. When we talk about the Goldilocks principle—the idea of stress being “just right”—there is some truth to it. A small, manageable amount of stress can stimulate growth and performance. But here’s the problem, stress is highly subjective. What’s tolerable for one person might be overwhelming for another. This is why it’s critical for managers to understand their team members’ unique needs, stress thresholds, and emotional triggers. The key is to push employees just enough to challenge them but not so much that they’re paralyzed by anxiety.
Performance reviews: triggering old patterns
The unfortunate reality is that traditional performance reviews often miss the mark. Instead of fostering a positive, developmental atmosphere, they activate deep-seated emotional responses rooted in our early experiences. For many, the performance review process triggers feelings from childhood – ones conditioned from school, when we were graded, judged, and often belittled. Our brains are wired to recognize patterns, and when faced with similar situations, we unconsciously revert to old, defensive behaviors.
In these moments, employees can start to feel like insecure children again, seeking validation, afraid of rejection, and slipping into a people-pleasing mode that ultimately diminishes their effectiveness at work. Performance reviews can induce this regression by fostering a sense of judgment rather than support.
This is a dangerous cycle. Instead of showing up as confident, capable adults, employees end up retreating into fear-based responses. The brain’s focus shifts from creativity and problem-solving to survival mode, where the primary goal becomes avoiding perceived failure. This stifles growth, limits innovation, and perpetuates a culture of anxiety rather than excellence.
Shifting the focus: how to support employee growth without stress
It’s time for companies to evolve their approach to performance management. Instead of relying on outdated, stress-heavy methods, here are a few strategies that can promote real growth, improve performance, and ensure employees feel supported, not judged:
1️⃣ Frequent, constructive feedback
Instead of waiting for a once-a-year performance review, make feedback a regular part of your workplace culture. When feedback is given frequently and constructively, it becomes less about judgment and more about growth. Employees are more likely to stay aligned with their goals, correct course when necessary, and feel supported in their development. This reduces the high-stakes pressure of annual reviews and keeps communication open and continuous.
2️⃣ Focus on growth, not just evaluation
Performance reviews should not just be about grading past behavior. They should also be an opportunity for employees to map out their future growth. Managers should frame these conversations around strengths and potential rather than solely focusing on areas for improvement. When employees feel like the conversation is about their career progression and personal development, they’ll be more engaged and motivated to contribute meaningfully.
3️⃣ Tailor management to individual needs
Each employee is unique, with different strengths, stress tolerances, and working styles. Managers should be trained to recognize these differences and adjust their approach accordingly, without pushing their team members into a fight-or-flight response. Not everyone responds to pressure in the same way, and it’s important to understand who thrives under certain conditions and who may need a more supportive, nurturing approach. Managers who know how to tailor their leadership style to individual employees will see better results, stronger teams, and more engaged workers.
4️⃣ Foster psychological safety
Employees who feel safe are more likely to take risks, innovate, and grow. When people fear being judged or punished for mistakes, they tend to play it safe, which limits creativity and productivity. By fostering a culture of psychological safety—where employees feel free to take risks, share new ideas, and learn from their mistakes—companies can encourage more dynamic and engaged teams.
5️⃣ Create opportunities for real dialogue
Performance reviews often feel like one-way conversations, where managers speak and employees listen. Instead, make these conversations more balanced by inviting employees to share their own reflections, concerns, and ideas for their development. This not only helps managers understand their team members better but also empowers employees to take ownership of their growth. Mutual dialogue fosters trust and reinforces a culture of support rather than judgment.
Breaking the cycle of stress and anxiety
At the core of this shift is a simple truth: we don’t want stressed, anxious children on our teams—we want capable, confident adults. The stress-inducing techniques of traditional performance reviews often create incorrect associations in our brains, taking us back to those childhood moments of judgment and anxiety. It’s time to break that cycle.
Managers play a critical role in helping employees grow and succeed. When we stop relying on outdated techniques that cause more harm than good, and instead focus on ongoing support, tailored feedback, and psychological safety, we empower our teams to thrive. And when employees thrive, so do companies.
It’s time for a new approach
If you’re a leader or manager, take a moment to reflect on your own performance management practices. Are you inadvertently causing stress and anxiety among your team? Are you supporting their growth in a way that brings out their best, or are you contributing to a cycle of fear and stress?
Let’s connect if you’re ready to explore new ways to support your employees, improve their performance, and build a healthier workplace culture. Your employees deserve better, and so does your business.
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